Nia White Belt

On a journey to come back into my body

and love my body after being detached and

dissociated fora long time by taking Nia white belt and dancing,
Learning that it is safe to be in my body
To stay in my body
To feel different parts of my body,
Learning that I can love my body,
That I can stay present in my body and
That I am safe.

Sitting on the floor,
My knees are hurting so badly,
My ankle is hurting so badly,
My lower back is hurting,
Because I am coming back into my body,
and my body has held the all of the traumas there,

It’s not that I am pushing myself,
It’s that my body is responding by bringing the trauma  pain to the surface,
Sometimes I cried during white belt,
Sometimes I start to cry when I am in my car alone.

I  use Arnica Montana gel to calm my body down,
Massage my knee and ankle,
Massage my lower back,
Talk to my body telling my body that we are okay, that I am safe
That this is healing
That it is safe to come  back into my body
That I am in a safe place and supported
That it is okay to feel whatever I need to feel
That I am listening to what my body is telling me
That I love my body
That I am here to protect myself

I understand where the pain is coming from
and I will address that by talking with therapist
Dance is good for me
My body has held all of the trauma’s inside and now is the time to take

even better care of myself.

Take Epsom salt baths,
Go to Reiki,
See therapist,
Stay in the level of movement that I need for that dance
Finding joy of movement
Letting the tears come

I love my body.
I am safe.
I can heal myself with self-love and touch.
I am a warrior goddess
I will take care of my,body and myself.

 

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